7 Ways to Relax During Menopause

With menopause comes stress. Make these simple lifestyle changes, and you can learn to relax and enjoy not having any more periods.

If the mere mention of the word “menopause” makes you cringe, you’re not alone. Despite a growing body of research showing that many women actually feel empowered or liberated by “the change,” negative attitudes and beliefs about it persist all over the world. The worst part is that these perceptions could be self-fulfilling prophecies. Studies show that women who have preconceived notions about the horrors of menopause actually report more severe symptoms than women who view the experience as a positive or natural part of life.

Many women see menopause as a reminder that they are getting older, “and society does not deal kindly with aging,” says Mache Seibel, MD, director of the Complicated Menopause Program at the University of Massachusetts Medical School, and co-author ofEat to Defeat Menopause with Karen Giblin, founder of the menopause education and management program Red Hot Mamas. “We’re still a very youth-oriented society. As a result, women who are transitioning may feel more the burden than the benefit.”

This kind of emotional stress often manifests itself physically. According to one study from the University of Pennsylvania, women with the highest anxiety levels during menopause experienced five times as many hot flashes as their less-anxious peers. This suggests that individuals may be literally worrying themselves sick, which could in turn feed their anxiety and further increase the severity or frequency of their symptoms.

Clearly, stress management is critical to surviving menopause. The good news is that there are several easy — and fun — ways to go about it.

Stress Relief Strategies

1. Laugh a little. Sometimes laughter is the best medicine . According to researchers from Loma Linda University in Loma Linda, Calif., the mere thought of laughing helps regulate stress hormones such as cortisol. Consistently high levels of cortisol have been linked with excess belly fat, depression, fatigue, and heart disease — all of which menopausal women are more vulnerable to already — so a good guffaw could have both short- and long-term benefits for your health during menopause and beyond. Make time during the week to watch your favorite sitcom, or sit and read the comics or a book of cartoons every day. You can even just call a friend who always makes you laugh.
2. Think on it. Meditation exercises have been shown to help relieve stress. In one recent study from the University of Massachusetts, menopausal women who participated in a weekly class that included mindfulness training didn’t reduce the intensity of their hot flashes but were better able to cope with them. After about 90 days, those who mastered the mindfulness techniques reported sleeping better, feeling less stress, and having a better quality of life. Breathing and other relaxation exercises are another great way to relax, says Seibel. “When you slow down your breath, you also slow down your mind, and this will stop some of the racing that is going on and causing you to feel stressed and overworked,” he says. “It’s all connected.”
3. Reclaim your sex life. Sex can be a stress reliever and help you relax, says Lovera Wolf Miller, MD, an obstetrician and gynecologist who wrote Womenopause: Stop Pausing and Start Living with her husband, David Miller, MD, a specialist in pain anesthesiology. Need proof? According to one Scottish study published in the journal Biological Psychology, both men and women were able to better cope with various stressful situations after having intercourse.
   Unfortunately, sex during menopause can sometimes be a source of — not a cure for — stress, but don’t give up. “When you lose your estrogen, as you do in menopause, you lose the ability to make lubrication and to be aroused,” Miller says. “But there are lots of things you can do to help.” One is to use vaginal lubricants and moisturizers. Another is to simply think about sex. If it’s on your mind, it can happen more.
4. Get regular exercise. Exercise releases feel-good hormones called endorphins, keeps you at a healthy weight (which boosts self-image), and improves your overall well-being. Plan a minimum of 150 minutes a week, whether that’s for 75 minutes twice a week or 30 minutes over five days. “If you can, exercise in the morning. It works better than Prozac to give you a high for the day,” Miller says. And don’t get discouraged if you’re out of shape — your workouts don’t have to be intense to be effective. Even a regular walking program can help. According to a study from Temple University in Philadelphia, just a 40-minute walk on most days of the week can significantly reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety. Researchers followed almost 400 premenopausal and menopausal women and found that those who walked regularly at a moderate pace (four miles per hour) reported less stress than women who did not exercise at all.
5. Get a massage. When you’re under stress, your muscles can tighten, Seibel says. Getting a massage can help reduce muscle tension — but that’s not all it can do. Researchers at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles found that massage therapy lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol and increases levels of the hormone oxytocin, which is associated with contentment.
6. Get needed sleep. Insomnia is a common symptom of menopause. In fact, as many as 72 percent of menopausal women and 61 percent of post-menopausal women experience serious sleep problems on a regular basis. These problems don’t just make you tired — they also make you more irritable and stressed. Research shows that people who have chronic insomnia also have high levels of cortisol. To improve the quality of your sleep, try to stick to a regular routine — go to bed at the same time every night and get up at the same time every morning — weekdays and weekends. Also, keep your room cool, dark, and quiet, and don’t fall asleep with the TV on — it can be a stimulant, not a relaxant. Coffee is also a stimulant, so cut caffeine from your diet after 6 p.m., or earlier if you find it takes awhile for it to wear off. And finally, use your bed for sex and sleep, and limit use of your computer to another room.
7. Play your carbs right. Your body needs carbohydrates to produce serotonin, a feel-good brain chemical that boosts mood and makes you feel calm and relaxed. High-fiber, whole-grain carbs are best — think quinoa, popcorn (sans butter!), and whole-wheat pasta. Bonus: A healthy diet can help prevent weight gain and lower your risk for certain diseases.

By Beth W. Orenstein 

Medically reviewed by Lindsey Marcellin, MD, MPH